Another Funny Story ^ ^

As we know laughter is the best medicine for us. If u stress or mad try to laugh, because it will make u feel comfortable and cool down.Trust me.ehehe. So here i have some stupid story for all of you..

Story 1:

A Computer Geek is crossing the road when he sees a frog who starts talking. "If you kiss me," the frog says, "I'll turn into a beautiful princess, stay with you for a week and do whatever you want." The guy smiles and pockets the frog. " Did you h

ear me?" ask the frog. "A beautiful princess? for a week?

"Look," says the nerd, "I haven't got time for a girlfriend. But a " talking frog" now that's cool."

Story 2:

The Farmer take a shortcut through his orchard to get to a nearby pond, carrying a bucket to bring some fruit. Once he gets to the pond, he is surprised to see two girls skinny dipping.

They see him and immediately drop below the water. "We're not coming out until you leaves!" shouts one of the girls. "I didn't come to watch you swim naked," say the farmer, holding up the bucket. "I'm just here to feed the gators."

Story 3:

Scientist have identified a food that, once digested, can have negative effect on people's health that last for decades, including mood-swings in women, psychotic episode in men and severe depression in both. It's called wedding cake.

Story 4:

Bert the snake goes to see his doctor. " I need something for my eyes. I can't see very well these days," he said. The doctor gives him a pair of glasses and tells him to come back in a fortnight.

Bert returns two weeks later and tell the doc he's very depressed. " What's the problem?" asks the doctor." Didn't the glasses help you?"

" The glasses are fine ," says Bert." But i just discovered I've been living with a garden hose for the last three years."

Story 5:

Have Two criminals who sentenced to die in the electric chair on the same day. The priest had given them both last rites and a formal speech had been given by the warden. The warden asked the first man, " Do you have a last question?"

The man replied, "Yes, sir, i do. I love James Blunt. Could i please hear 'You're Beautiful' one last time?". Of course." replied the warden. He turned to the other man and asked, " What about you? what is your final request?"

" Please." said the condemned man. "kill me first."

Drum And Bass!!

Many musical genres have long since taken their baby steps before the general public tends to notice them. Rock and roll was already coming into it’s own before Alan Freed dubbed the famous moniker. Rap was long the voice of the street in New York before the Sugar Hill Gang took the Chic bass line from ‘Good Times’ and gave us ‘Rapper’s Delight.’ So long before David Bowie became entranced with drum and bass, it was the new hip music playing in the clubs in New York and London.

Drum and Bass is a form of dance music in which the name is taken from the part of the songs where the music breaks down to just the drums and the bass. It is a relatively new genre of dance music. It is really fast, usually around 140-170 beats per minute. The oddity here, though, is that a lot of the singing and music in a drum and bass track plays at half of this speed, so usually only the drums are moving this fast. This gives almost a Coltrane-type of feeling to this genre, a sense of chaos and frThough started in the London club scene in the early 90s by Fabio and Grooverider, it has spread rather quickly. It is not uncommon to hear drum and bass in Volkswagen commercials and during movies. In the last couple of years, soundtracks to Senseless, Pi, The Jackal, The Saint and Lost Highway have all contained tracks that could be considered drum and bass. David Bowie completed an entire electronic album in 1997, Earthling, which included quite a bit of drum and bass. That same year, Roni Size’s first major label album, New Forms, won the Brit Award for Album of the Year. It is a very encompassing genre, because just as easily as it can be fierce and manic it can be lush and soothing. Drum and Bass is one of the most creative, innovative, and flexible genres of music today.

It’s good for us to be exposed to something before they know what it is. It helps to ease it into our minds. Drum and Bass is strange enough at times that many people would not even give it a chance had they not already been exposed. At times, it is almost like the science fiction of musical genres, like something we enjoy seeing but turn our heads at the most graphic point. It is not for everyone, but if interested in exploring a bit more, here is a list of wonderful drum and bass albums to get you started: Roni Size/Reprazent—New Forms, Alex Reece—So Far, Goldie—Timeless,Various artists—This Is Jungle Sky,vol. 2, Various artists—Logical Progression, vol. 3, Various artists—Jungle: Sound of the Underground, David Bowie—Earthling,

What Is Boxing?

Boxing is a martial art and a combat sport in which two people, male or female, generally of similar weight, fighteach other with their fists. Boxing is supervised by a referee and is typically engaged in during a series of one- to three-minute intervals called rounds. There are three ways to win. Victory is achieved if the opponent is knocked out and unable to get up before the referee counts to ten seconds (a Knockout, or KO) or if the opponent is deemed too injured to continue (a Technical Knockout, or TKO). If there is no stoppage of the fight before an agreed number of rounds, a winner is determined either by the referee's decision or by judges' scorecards.

Fist fighting depicted in Sumerian relief carvings from the 3rd millennium BC, while an ancient Egyptian relief from the 2nd millennium BC depicts both fist-fighters and spectators. Both depictions show bare-fisted contests. In 1927 Dr. E. A. Speiser, an archaeologist, discovered aMesopotamian stone tablet in Baghdad, Iraq depicting two men getting ready for a prize fight. The tablet is believed to be 7,000 years old. The earliest evidence for fist fighting with any kind of gloves can be found on Minoan Crete (c. 1500–900 BC), and on Sardinia, if we consider the boxing statues of Prama mountains (c. 2000–1000 BC)

Dream Stay At Sipadan Water Village Resort

A stay at sipadan Water Village Resort could very well make you wish it is your home, a dream place where you connect with nature and immerse in its pure beauty and modern comforts that elicit a sense of wonder and awakening.

The internationally renowned first water-cottage island resort in Malaysia stand on stilts above crystal clear water by the the shallow shore of Mabul Island, about 35 minutes boat ride from Semporna town in the east coast of sabah.

Sheltered from the storm, Sipadan Water Village Resort comprises 45 wooden water cottage that are spacious with wide sliding doors that open onto the rooms private deck for the magnificient ocean viewing. Since its opening in 1983, Sipadan Water Village Resort has develop an enviable reputation in every corner around the globe. Its architecture was inspired by the local Bajau Laut's traditional palm thatched houses made of ironwood. Visitors would have the chance to experience the life of the Bajau who are mostly fisherman. The Resort is very concerned about preserving its unspoilt environment, which explains why all of its rooms are equipped with fans, except for two that are air-conditioned. Sipadan Water Village Resort is the one of the best for Holiday.

Why Chef??

what i know about chef is the reality being a chef has its chellenges and this is where we talk about them in a nonsens way. You know the kitchen can often be hot and steamy,the work environment like a presurre cooker, and you're required to work many hours. But we also talk about the unique realeties of each segment;dealing with the executive committee in a hotel, working with hospital patients, and feeding troops in a war zone.

Truthfully, no one thing lured me into this culinary course. I take this course and want become a chef one day because interested to become a chef and it really all started with a love for food. I dont think i ever really accepted that it was easy to make food taste good, it seemed to be so scaredfor by anyone cooking. I still remmember that have some of my friend ask me,do you think you are born to be a chef? and i answer perhaps i'm are, perhaps not, but what i know is we are born with work, ethnics, pride, dedication, and perseverance. We are born to lead, born to teach, born to create! I dind't know what i want ed either.ahahaha

secrets to living hapilly with your couples!!

You see them holding hands at the movies,strolling arm in arm on the street,shopping mall and many places. These are the happy couples..How do they do it?for your information here the secrete;1- There's are strong connection when you first meet. Ask any happy couple and they probably tell you they felt an instant connection and experienced a profound rapport when they first met. So, there is some truth to the saying "love at the first sight". 2- Different personalities, shared value. This delicate balance allows couples to realize that elusive combination of friendship (based on shared values) and passion (based on different). In many happy relationship,couples manage to be friends and lovers at once, an impressive achievement given that the conditions of friendship are in some ways diametrically opposed to the conditions that promote desire. 3- Respect for each other. A girl in a happy relationship know her man respects her ideas, beliefs and values regardless of whether he understand or egress with them. His love and respect are unconditional;he doesn't judge her. He may express an opinion, but the relationship is secure enough that she is free to disagree. 4- Your partner is always your best friends. Truly happy couples use the phrase "best friends", to describe their relationship. By "best friend", they mean they like each other best, above all others. They spend large amount of time together, talking, and pursuing joint interest. Whatever it is they want to do together. 5- No grudges. Of course, some argue more often and more fiercely than others. But contented couples say the real secret to their happiness is their ability to avoid getting vicious. So,if and when you quarrel, don't ever keep a grudge. When faced with a conflicts,it's okay to blow up and storm about,but then you've got to make a conscious decision to move on. 6- Roll with the changes. Most couples will change a great deal throughout the course of their relationship. Only the few will feel they are exactly the same people they where when they first got together. But happy couples always feel they've change for the batter. 7- Always focus on the positive. As psychologists have known for many years,positive expectations exert a tremendous force for positive result. Couples thrive in a relationship when their partners focus on the positive aspects of their personality and belive each other. 8- Passion and Romance. Many happy couples say friendship is more important than sex. However,a large number of relationship are founded in a deeply sexual love. 9- Power is not a problem. If a man and women truly love each other,they will not battle each other for dominance to see who comes out on top. This is not to say that there is no conflict whatsover in the relayionship,but reather,the arguments are neve,at any level about power and status. In a stable relationship,who pays for what would normally have been sorted out very early on in the relationship!!!

"pieces of me"ahahahahaha!

Water flows through rivers
As it flows through my eyes
They say a pieces dreamer
Has lived other lives!
There something more there, i can see it clear
not something you hold in your hand
the end of the circle
it ends with me in eternity
The poet and the dreamer
creating pieces flow
there is world that we possess
that all of you cant know
Beyond just what you can see lies darkness
my life it changes with everything around me
sometime need to go get the hell out of here!!
If you are a soul in need
if you need compassion
i will stand up like a wall right by your side
i can tell what others can tell..
yes, i can read your mind!
Pieces belong in other world at another time
Neptune rules my hours
devoted by your side
The hearth of the pieces
soul lives through time..
through time..
Only you know the answer...

How to make "Sardine Croquettes"

Ingredients we need:

• 1 tbsp olive oil
• 1 large onion, peeled and chopped
• 2 cans (200g) sardines (you can use any type of sardines what you want)
• 3 medium size potatoes, boiled and skin peeled off
• little bit salt and paper to taste (depends on you)
• 1 1/2 tbsp sweet relish (available at supermarkets)
• juice of 2 limes
• 1 egg
• 2 cups breadcrumbs
• 1 cup oil for deep frying

Step 1- heat the olive oil in a pan over medium fire. When hot,stir fry onion until soft, about 30 second, then sardines.
Step 2- mash boiled potatoes. Add to sardines and onion mix in pan. Season with salt and paper then remove from fire.
Step 3- Add sweet relish and lime juice to the sardine potato mix. Allow to cool for 5 minutes. To make croquettes, press the mixture into oval or round shapes.
Step 4- Lightly beat egg in a bowl. Dip croquettes individually into the egg. Coat completely with egg.
Step 5- Place breadcrumbs on a plate. Roll croquettes lightly over. Place on a tray and chill in the fridge for at least 30 minutes.
Step 6- Heat oil in a pan until hot. Deep fry croquettes until golden brown and crispy, then drain on paper towels. Serve with thousand island sauce or any types of sauce you want.
This recipe i learned from magazine and i already try make it. The test very good and delicious! because the combination of sardines and the potatoes very match. You all can try make it. I sure you will satisfy when you taste it!

How to make "CHOCOLATE CUP CAKE"

Ingredients we need:

• 1 1/3 cups plain flour
• 2 tsp baking powder
• 1/3 cup cocoa
• 3 tbsps butter, softened
• 1 1/2 cups caster sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1 cup milk

To make it first you need to preheat oven at 180'c. Meanwhile, sift together flour, baking powder and cocoa in a bowl. Set aside.
second, use mixer to cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy. Add eggs one at one time, beating well with each addition.
Third, add the flour alternately with the milk, and beat well. Then line a muffin pan with paper cups. Fill the muffin cups with the mixture until three quarters full.
Lastly bake it for 15 minutes, or until a skewer inserted into the cupcake comes out clean.
This recipe very easy, simple, delicious and the coast is cheapest. Try make it with you own self!^ ^

"THE TALK..."

This story about a boy that very love at one girl...the girl same college with him also his friend.Honestly..the boy don't know how to tell the girl that he very love her!the boy just keep his felling in hearth..Until one day,the boy make his self brave and call the girl. . .

Boy:I need someone to talk to.
Girl:I'm always here for you.
Boy:I know.
Girl:what's wrong?
Boy:I like her so much.
Girl:Talk to her.
Boy:I don't know.She won't ever like me.
Girl:Don;t say that..you're amazing.
Boy:I just want her to know how i feel.
Girl:Then tell her.
Boy:She won't like me.
Girl:How do you know that?
Boy:I can just tell her...
Girl:Well just tell her.
Boy:What should I say?
Girl:Tell her how much you like her.
Boy:I tell her daily.
Girl:What do you mean?
Boy:I'm always with her...I love her.
Girl:I know how you feel.I have the same problem...but he'll never like me.
Boy:Wait. who do you like?
Girl:Oh,some boy.
Boy:Oh,she won't like me either.
Girl:she does.
Boy:How do you know?
Girl:Because who wouldn"t like you.
Boy:You.
Girl:You're wrong.I love you.
Boy:I love you too.
Girl:So are you going to talk to her?
Boy:I just did...

"Rub Eye"

One man that his hand using a hook,mutilated leg,and one eye being in one interview for becoming a pirates!

Interviewer:"how can you leg mutilated?"
Man:"injured when war world two!"
Interviewer:"why you hand have a hook?"
Man:been cut with a bigger knife!"
Interviewer:"then you eye?"
Man:one day,when raining,i look upwards to the sky,suddenly have one bird dropped his shit into my eye.
Interviewer:is that the cause you eye damage and only one left??
Man:No.That not the cause. My eye excluded when i use my hook to rub my eye. .uhuhuhu.

"Scream Togather"

There are five kids playing around at one river.Suddenly,one of the kids fall into the river.Although they all don't know how to swim.Then one of them take action with scream.
"HELP! HELP!"
Because sound of the scream very slow and cannot heard by another people,then one of the kids say. . .
"Maybe better we all scream Together!"
"Yes! that's a good idea"answer his friend.And they start to scream. .

"TOGETHER! TOGETHER! TOGETHER!

"Dialog 2 Ghost!!"

This story about two ghost!!this two ghost just meet and then they talk idly to fill up the time as a ghost.In they chat,ghost B always shiver,then ghost A fell weird and asking,
"why you always shiver?"
Oh...because my death very difficult!I'm dead in refrigerator. . .cold!!answer ghost B,at the same shiver.
"Oh. .pity. .me dead because hearth attack".say ghost A nicely.
"Are you really have serious hearth problem?why don't you,make operation at hospital?if you make it,sure now you will sitting with you family.Reply ghost B.
Already..i already make it!in fact before i dead,i in recovery.Long story. . .answer ghost A with sadness..
"story it to me.please".
"OK..i suspect that my wife dishonest with me,she have another man!so one day,i think want to trap my wife.Then as usually,i go to work but actually i park my car at the end junction not far from my house.Like i think,suddenly i see one car enter to my car park house.I just relax,because want find the suitable time to catch them!!"
"So,you get them them two??"ask ghost B,with interesting.
"No.I don't get them.I just see my wife in the room alone.What i confused here,when i enter to my house.I see a shoes in front the door of my house.
I asked my wife,but she don't want answer it.So i go search and running around my house,to find that man!all the room in my house,i already search,but i cannot find it.Lastly,i fell tired because running and then i was fainted because hearth attack and i don't expect i will die. .."say ghost A for end his story with sadness. . .
Ghost B,silently heard story from ghost A.Then during the time ghost B saying something. .
"Why don't you check at the refrigerator in you house?if you check there,sure we two will still alive. . . .."

"I'm Sorry"

This story about a girl that her language in English very terrible. .
One day she was crash with US tourist when she walk at the mall.
Girl:"I'm sorry"
Us tourist:"I'm sorry too"
The girl become confused, because don't understand what the us tourist say. She just guest and directly answer it. .
Girl:"I'm sorry three"
Us Tourist:"what are you sorry for?"
Girl:"I'm sorry five". .
Us Tourist:??????